Sunday, November 5, 2017

In my Head!


Strange things are happening!

I finished my 3rd book this morning. 

Today, I got up at 6am, without any effort. Prepared my coffee and started reading. In between, prepared my breakfast, ate and continued with my book.

Weird thing is, every time I pick a book it somehow answers the question I have in the back of my mind or something I am thinking about at that very moment. Or may be we all know what we need to know, sometimes we need an external influence to realise what's inside our mind.

Like, few days back, before I thought of going back to my resolution of reading, I strongly felt I need a psychiatrist. I was unable to cope up with my head and I was strongly in need of help. At least that's what I felt. For me it's very difficult to talk to people, sometimes I hate being an introvert. And now a days, every Tom Dick and Harry is writing articles about mental health and blah blah. 

One strong reason was my messed up state of mind and other one was coming across these stupid posts on social media every now and then. 

Anyhow, in my opinion, restricting social media usage is somewhat peaceful!

Last Sunday evening, I saw a book store and randomly picked these books and decided to get back to reading. I casually decided to begin with "Veronica Decides to Die" by Paulo Coelho.

To my surprise, that book one by one when talked about madness, I found my answers for which I was seeking help and was feeling restless. I realized I no more need a psychiatrist and it's okay to be in a state where I am right now. Not everyone can feel with the same intensity.

The book left me wondering what just happened and I somehow ended up liking it, for how it answered my random questions.

The similar thing happened after finishing "The Alchemist" by Paulo Coelho too, it answered questions which were not even there in the first place. As if its some kind of Magic!

I was surprised for what it had done to my head.

When the book (Veronica..) was over, I was lost in my thoughts and I wished I could live a peaceful life in a small town and wrote on my blog about my craving for that slow life.

Right after Veronica.... I picked "The Choice" by Nicholas Spark.

Again, a wonderful thing happened, the story somehow left me feeling different. It was absolutely everything I would love to live. Slow peaceful adventurous life! As if someone gave beautiful words to my imagination. Except for the sadness in later part of the book I loved it thoroughly. It left me feeling happy.

In between all this, I was thinking, now a days I remember all my dreams and lately I have experienced similar dream twice! And somehow these dreams are leaving a left a strange impact on me. The end meaning is always similar!

Anyway, Friday night, I started reading my 3rd book which was "Sputnik Sweetheart" by Haruki Murakami. I found it dark and deep, not particularly a happy book to read. It was different experience though. Living through those dark thoughts and gloomy emotions!

I don't know why my brain is shouting out so loud. I have just finished Sputnik..., and I am still under it's effect. I might take few days to come out of it. Though I'll start my 4th one tonight. Hopefully!

This Sunday is going to be a busy one, winter is here and I have to look for my woolens, wash my summer wear and pack them back.. and few more chores to catch up with.

Let's see how it will turn out to be.

I don't really know what I just jotted down, cleared my head though. 

Hope to be here soon. 

Dear God, thanks for everything.

Friday, November 3, 2017

Happy Endings! :-)


How far should you go in the name of love?

Woohoo :) :)

I finished my second book, The Choice by Nicholas Spark

And I totally loved this one for so many reasons, one of which is I loved the story. My love for love stories made it easier for me to fall for another one, yet again. 

Story began beautifully, everything absolutely perfect. The kind of life I would love to have, slow and steady in a small and peaceful town. Life full of calm, excitement, happiness, adventure, friendship and most importantly love! Love so unexpected and spontaneous!

I know I am filmy and dramatic, but, I can't stop feeling happy, I started reading this one on this Wednesday evening and since then I was living in awe of it. The story was generic though, may be I was swayed away by the way it was written.

I skipped my walk for it, read it while I traveled for my meetings, waiting for client, sipping my coffee and when I was not reading it I found myself smiling thinking about it. Crazy!

And all this was when I am not even a book-nerd. Though reading is one habit I would sincerely like to cultivate. Something, I admire in people.

But honestly, I am more like looking at the moon, listening to music while I leisurely stroll in the evening kind of person. 

As I was reading this book, I was so anxious about what will happen next with every page I was turning. 

It was a perfectly simple story, and I visualized every situation in my head and I lived through it, experienced it. Ah, it was brilliant. 

Though with every complexity increasing in the end I was wishing for a happy ending with tears in my eyes. I am sure had it been a sad ending it would have affected me, somewhat seriously. Like, I remember watching a Disney movie lately which messed up my head for almost a week and I was unable to get over it, it killed something in me and getting over it was not easy, the name of the movie was "Bridge to Terabithia", it left me in tears and I cried through the night.

So much I hate tragic endings, no words can explain!

I somehow crave for things to turn better in every story I read or watch, as if its my innate need to see everything turning alright. 

Anyhow, I am going to start with my next one, Yayy :)

Dear God, I love you, please take care of my people. Muuuuaah :* :*

Wednesday, November 1, 2017

Books & Me!


Reading a good book is like living in awe of it till the time it's over, 
and then, thinking about it for few days with a heavy heart.

My only resolution of 2017 was reading 25 pages every night before going to sleep and as usual I successfully failed at it. 

I have a decent history of failing at keeping my resolutions and somehow, I have accepted it. But anyhow I still try! Stubborn me.

Recent Sunday, I decided to revive my resolution and read at least few books in this year, though, I have finished 3 in 9 monthson Sunday, I bought 5 books and decided to give it a serious try to finish them by this Christmas.

The first one I started was 'Veronica decides to die' by Paulo Coelho which I finished in 2 days, I intentionally started with the thinnest one to regain my faith that I can do it.

And it gave me an assurance that I can think of finishing 4 more in the decided timeline.

I somehow believe deactivating my social accounts is proving to be fruitful. (No, I can't do things in moderation, if want to reduce something, I need an absolute cut-off). 

Lately, I have started carrying my book with me, to meetings, to office and try to read whenever I get a chance, whether I am waiting for a meeting or in my minuscule free time when no one is around, which I find crazily exciting. Much better than scrolling Facebook or Instagram in my free time. And strange thing is I wait to open it and read few pages every time I get a chance. It rules my head all the time and I think about it when I am not reading it.

"Veronica decides to die" was a good read, I didn't expect anything from it though, but still, it was better than what I thought. With every story I read, about every character, I was reassured I am Mad :P 

Though, the addiction thing always happens whenever I start reading a book, but, this time it was more intense. I used to look forward to get a chance to grab it and read. This usually never happens. This time it replaced my morning-evening's YouTube hour, occupied my coffee time, I reduced time I dedicated to other important things. And I loved it. :)

I am feeling good, and now, I am going to start another one. Yayy :)

Dear God, I love you, please take care of my people. No! I don't want anything. Muuaah
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